"Thanks for this article.
Made me cry as I am in the situation.
He was instantly physically attracted, still is. He was interested in me, we dated… and then boom! His interest vanished overnight!
We are still in contact and very close, yes I can handle it… I have learned to be grateful for what happens to me in life
We still have a good connection.
He tells me, he still feels drawn to me but doesn’t know why the spark vanished.
It is sometimes hard, cause I did not get a clue.
Thing is I know that it is not about me not being ‘enough’!!!
It is just so hard to understand for me…
He is confused himself as he says I am everything he is looking for in a woman… but there is the unknown but…
So I move on… don’t wait for him, still open to him if…"
You're welcome and thank you Nathalie. Good to hear you're moving on but UNLESS you plan on interacting with him in a completely different way - as in ways that may be proposed in some of the programs I sell that show you how it must be done, I would NOT still be open to him.
With that said I'll be honest with you AND I'm sure you can handle it.
When a guy says the spark is gone it generally means his interest was purely physical in the beginning but based on your past and present interactions with him, it didn't get past that point.
Men don't typically define "spark" the same way as a woman does. As a man it's generally physical or another way of saying it so try not to confuse that wit something more important which I'll cover below.
The thing is - YOU believe there's still a connection but it's probably just a friendly one.
So you haven't connected with him on the level a man NEEDS to feel.
He tells you he's still drawn to you but there's no "spark" and he doesn't know why - it's more than likely because he's lying to you and probably himself too which is why you hear it.
He's not in touch with his feelings all too well. It's a common "guy" thing. He can not explain it in real terms that would make more sense.
That doesn't mean he's doing it purposely - some guys will, but most just say it because they can not explain why they don't have deeper feelings for you.
NOW... here's the part that really sucks to say, let alone to hear but it's my purely objective opinion based on my knowledge of men, women, dating, and relationships:
When a man says you're EVERYTHING he is looking for in a woman BUT is still unsure... again - he's entirely full of it, himself, and he's possibly fooling himself in the process to without even knowing it.
Think about it - IF you were that everything to him, WHY wouldn't he move forward?
Because he's scared?
Possibly BUT here's the reality:
He's actually MORE SCARED to commit to the WRONG woman which means he's not convinced or feeling it enough to BELIEVE you're the right woman for him therefore - he does NOT feel that way.
You can read all about the REAL fears a man experiences in my very long and confusing post here: Why Guys Have Every Reason To Be Afraid of Commitment? His Every Fear.
He's merely saying it to spare your feelings, to convince himself to stick around and get whatever he can from you, and/or he's keeping you around until THAT woman who does make him feel that way shows up in his life.
At which point he'll disappear from your life AND if that doesn't happen any time soon, he'll keep you "on the hook" until he's bored OR YOU change how you interact with him.
Okay - so notice the key points here as it relates to you because I'm not here to tell you that you're not good enough for him.
You said, "Thing is I know that it is not about me not being ‘enough’!!!"
And I'm NOT going to tell you that you're not.
So... Something else is at play here. Something VERY important. Something that can change EVERYTHING between you and him.
You can BE the greatest woman in the world - inside and out - but unless you know the skills of attracting a man on another level AND the skill of CONNECTING with him in a way which he FEELS it...
Lots of great guys just won't give it their all to lock you down and commit to you.
Because the skill of being EVERYTHING has little to do with it AND sometimes being that way, actually pushes guys away because they're intimidated and can not find a way to connect to a woman who thinks, believes, and acts like she's got it all AND quite possibly don't need a man in her life to make her feel complete.
As duly noted in of those programs I mentioned above.
Men WANT to be your hero and that's very hard to do when you've got it all going on so figuring out a way to make him feel that way can change everything.
Here's the video and text that explains it better:
The "secret" that you're missing is in your interactions with him, how you communicate to him, AND HOW you CONNECT with him in a way that draws him closer and closer to you so he FEELS like you ARE actually everything he's been looking for in a woman.
Unfortunately - just because you feel you "connected" with a man doesn't mean you've connected with him the RIGHT way as noted in my editors notes on Rori Raye's work I posted up:
"You can’t go through his mind.
You can’t go through his body.
You can’t go down the spiritual road either."
I'm sorry to hear you're crying over this.
I DO feel your pain (sort of) because in my past I never gave myself a real opportunity to even get that far with a woman whom I adored, so the pain I've been through in my life wasn't "better to be in love for a moment than to never experience it" -it was just never truly being loved by a woman...
BUT that didn't stop me as I'm now happily married to the love of my life and it's certainly NOT going to stop you either.
THAT I can tell about you.
PLEASE do NOT wait for him - He's not there.
IF you insist on seeing things through, just use that resilient strong smart brain of yours to make a REAL change in how you interact and CONNECT with him.
You have everything to gain and NOTHING to lose because you feel you've already lost him so it's either up from here with him OR onto someone where you can use the great new skills on so this NEVER happens to you again.
Follow the link above or below to Rori, she can help you out:
THANK YOU so much for sharing. I do appreciate it and if you have any more questions or comments, just leave them below and I'll get back to you as soon as I can.
Feel better - it's all good from here on out.
Credits:
- Image by Pixabay found at Pexels.
- His Secret Obsession - The Hero Instinct Explained - Video presentation by Jame Bauer.
- Have The Relationship You Want - Connect With Him The RIGHT Way & Have Him Fall In Love With Your Heart
- Rori Raye - Have the relationship you want free newsletter link.
- The Right & Wrong Ways To Try and Connect With A Man
Related articles you might be connected to: