What Does It Mean If He Asks, Do You Love Me?

What does it mean if he asks, do you love me? For the past two weekends, the guy I’ve been seeing has asked me many times… do you love me? Does that mean he loves me and is seeing where I am? or what??

Hi Michelle,

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If a guy has NOT told you he loves you AND he’s asked you many times if you love HIM, I would assume he is making sure you’re the one who says it first… among other things.

I don’t find it strange a guy would do this but a little puzzling that you didn’t tell me what your answer to him was.

And now I get to sound like him… Do you love him Michelle?

It appears he thinks or believes he did something wrong.

That could be something common like not feeling good enough for you.

It could also mean he’s terrible at reading you. Like he’s analyzing everything you do as it pertains to him.

Men who do this all too often are constantly looking for assurance, validation, and they want to hear the words themselves before they can even begin to believe it’s true.

They are also ( typically or generally ) not trusting and very needy because instead of trusting a woman likes them back, they need to constantly hear it from her mouth to be certain.

Rather than wait for it to happen – they either probe indirectly or directly ask – Do You Love Me? As in your situation.

Honestly it sounds like a self-esteem and or confidence issue.

I would love to tell you that it definitely means he loves you ( assuming he hasn’t even said it yet ) BUT in my opinion, or my gut is telling me, this guy might not know exactly what love is, what it is supposed to feel like, how he’s supposed to express it AND how long it takes to develop with someone.

Something which is all too common for guys.

Ask lots of men what they believe love is and how it feels and you should get lots of different answers based on their personal experiences or transition into maturity.

Based on what you wrote – I would see this as a warning sign especially if you haven’t known each other for that long.

Early on – it should be, “Haha! You love me. :p “ and not “Do you like me?” or “Do you love me?” or anything like that at all.

“Us guys fight off an intense urge to catch some women as quick as possible… Especially when we believe you can have any man you want.”

But you already knew that I bet.

You also guessed that, yes, he’s more than likely just seeing where you’re at.

Again mostly because he’s not reading you too well and has a lack of confidence in attracting women or and I think you’ll like this one… He might actually believe you’re too good for him. 😀

Take a look at the signals you’ve been sending him or to guys in general and if you notice a pattern of confused guys, then consider changing the little hints you give.

It’s not absolutely recommended – because the better guys to tend get the hint easily or assume it anyways. They’re the ones who tease you early on about how into them YOU are.

You can also look at your attractive edge over other women.

This means extremely beautiful women tend to scare guys into believing you wouldn’t like him, or they wonder why you would be attracted to them, or they do lots of weird things to keep you interested…

They also feel pressured into moving too quickly because of the competition.

If this guy is feeling any pressure like those or any pressure at all he could definitely be thinking of moving too quickly.

Us guys fight off a sometimes intense urge to catch the women we feel strong towards as quickly as possible… Especially when we believe you can have any man you want.

All in all – it doesn’t mean he loves you – the possibility is there but after only a few weekends I would be careful about a guy who falls in love that quickly.

Not only because of his confidence and understanding of love – but because it’s in our “guy nature” to experience attraction early on which THEN leads to love.

This is NOT 100% but if we confuse those hormones with something longer and deeper what’s going to happen when the rush wears off…

Will we then feel like we’ve fallen out of love?

Just some lovely thing to think about Michelle.

Thanks for sharing your personal questions and I do hope this has helped you out a little,

Pete