I'm going to start with this some words about men I normally don't like to say: ONLY insecure - approval seeking guys - who feel forgotten or succumb to believe they're helpless to change their stay or status in life absolutely HATE being ignored.
You'll find the entire list of character traits listed below on the types of men who doesn't respond well to being ignored.
The rest will either see it for what it is: a passive aggressive game to illicit a certain response OR they won't even know they're being ignored or care negating the game entirely.
So why do THOSE other guys hate being ignored?
A lack of attention when they desperately need it. Give them a little and take it away and you can literally watch them squirm as they plan their next move to stop it.
Insecurity - no one likes to feel insecure and tell if I'm wrong, but feeling jealous is not the most fun feeling in the world. Show another guy more attention and start ignoring the first guy and you'll quickly see his anger grow. He'll desperately try to hold it back but eventually it will send him over the top and he'll do some crazy stuff to assure he's HEARD once and for all.
Immaturity - Most mature stable adult men can handle being ignored and will often not let it affect them too much. They respond one way or another to it but rarely is it with anger or desperation.
The more mature man deals with being ignored and can see it quite differently. He may simply see it as you wanting space or just living your life independently. You not paying attention to him is rarely taken personal at all.
The immature guy - even one who appears mature might be sent over the edge when a woman he loves, is into, or anyone begins to ignore him IF he has hidden issues with not being seen or heard or paid attention to at a time he needs it the most.
The truly immature guy is triggered to ACT OUT when he's being ignored because he's, well immature and hasn't learned how to deal with his emotions in a more adult manner.
An overly self-conscious man will also not handle being ignored in a positive way but his reaction can be much different - You see, for him everything is taken personal as if it pertains to him. When something happens, lots of things beyond being ignored, he believes HE is the cause.
The too self-conscious man tends to think a little too much and connects things in his brain which (most of the time) should NOT be connected AND he typically finds fault within himself as to why it happened.
Take this situation for example:
You're seeing a self-conscious man and you said you were going to text him at a certain time but you got busy, the time passed by, and you missed the sending the message.
In HIS world he will first dismiss it but then as time goes by he begins to overthink and over-analyze the situation. He starts to wonder.
Did he do something wrong?
Was it something he said?
Do you still like him?
Worse yet, if he's also a little immature and insecure he can find himself thinking there MUST be another man - that's WHY you didn't text him.
Depending on the rest of his traits he'll either act out on it through jealousy, anger or both OR withdraw and become overly quiet when you get back to him. You could even truthfully explain why you didn't contact him but deep in his mind - the connection is already there and he's less likely to be it to be true.
His silence will get worse as he continues to internalize the events that took place until it ALL comes out either in a very strange way or further withdrawing in a highly passive aggressive nature.
I understand this can be a very confusing often complex problem so I'll break down the traits of a guy who DOES hate being ignored:
- Insecure.
- Little belief in himself.
- Low self-esteem.
- Overly self-conscious.
- Over thinker.
- Analyzes things too much.
- Connects external events that may or may not be connected to him personally.
- Attention seeker.
- Passive aggressive by nature.
- Takes things or life and what happens to him way too personal.
- The jealous type.
- Immature or hasn't fully grasped how to handle his stronger emotions.
- Feels somewhat helpless to make positive changes in his life.
- Unsure or convinced on how someone feels about him.
- Feels like he has little or no control over his life.
I'm sure there's more but that's enough for now.
You can now clearly see there's a distinct pattern of a guy who will absolutely HATE being ignored.
You can also see how in the so-called games of "dating" and "relationships" the IGNORE card is often used because it can illicit a response that PROVES something very important to a man or woman.
It's typically used as a means to measure a man's interest of feelings towards a woman.
In other words - ignore a man and if he acts out or even withdraws further it could mean he cares because as stated in another post...
Ignoring someone who couldn't care less does NOTHING as stated in this post:
Will It Drive Him Crazy If You Ignore Him? The Problem of Ignoring Men.
Making this GAME an often used one for quick results.
It's also (although terrible) way of determining a man's character IF and when it's done purposely or not.
I reveal over 40 questions you can ask about a man to help you determine his character in my book:
"Understanding Men Made Simple" - you can pick it up below at no charge.
In an ideal world you should NEVER have to resort to ignoring a man just to determine a man's character but it does happen and will continue to happen despite it being a game.
Normally it's accidental. One does not INTEND to ignore someone else. Circumstance and situation often plays the major role here.
My obvious advisement is against all game playing even if it's effective because they often lead to something far worse.
There are much more beneficial and ATTRACTIVE ways to determine a man's character quickly.
You should not NEVER have to ignore a guy and a guy should not have to ignore you purposely to get a reaction, see if interest is there or not, or figure out someone's character with this test.
Here's the biggest reason why:
What if you DO ignore a guy who is far from what is listed above ONLY to find out he's a mature and secure man who isn't reacting in a way which either determines like, interest, or love OR shows any sign that he even noticed?
You will - without a doubt - push him away and he will NEVER come back.
Mature men HATE game playing of any sort just as much as you do and once found out... it's GAME OVER.
The author of this article is either a beta cuck or a gay dude. I get plenty of female attention and sex on the regular but if a woman i start talking to suddenly ignores me she gets dropped, blocked, no second chance. Its because I value myself as a man a d to know I’m valued. It’s women like that who turn men into POA and just start using women’s insecurities to manipulate them to smash and move on. The author of the article has no clue what he’s talking about. You can tell just by looking at him (googled).
Cool name… Peter.
Honestly, I have no idea why all the name calling and what my looks have anything do with my opinion. And you googled my picture? Bored much? Haha!!!
Nice – but you could’ve just looked at my about me page.
Anyways – Apparently you don’t like being ignored and you feel you don’t fit into the one of the categories I’ve listed above. I hear you and we could argue about that. Probably not going to happen here though.
However, I’m going to say based on your crude “name-calling” response and more, that you DO fit in at least one or more of them. Specifically these three:
*immature.
*Connects external events that may or may not be connected to him personally.
*Takes things or life and what happens to him way too personal.
Thanks for sharing.
I put my name and email just to write this…
“Lmaooooooooooo!”
Only secure guys don’t like being ignored? Ok. Try texting or calling a guy you like. If he doesn’t get back to you in a week, how does that make you feel? Do you not like it? Is it just because you’re insecure?
The truth is, if you ignore a secure guy he probably won’t go out of his way to talk to you again because he has already moved on. Why would he waste his time? He’s a secure guy with options
There’s this particular guy I’ve been getting to know for a while. We always joke smile and tease one another. I find him staring at me when i look back as well. But one day i wasn’t just myself, i was emotionless and angry . The guy attempted to say i to me and i ignored him. Now i feel kinda bad and stuck and dont know what to do ?
Give him time to get over it in case he took it the wrong way or personal.
The “right” guys know how to deal with the emotional ups and downs of others including women and do their best to not take it personal. Hopefully this guy is that person. If not, then it is HIS problem to deal with and not yours.
The next time you see him, pretend nothing happened. Go right back to what was happening before. If he’s THAT confused, concerned, or interested, let him ask you what happened and feel free to let him know a little. Not too much. Just say you were, “Off your game that day 😉 ” and let it go.
Pete
Hi 🙂 peter
What does it mean when an old guy best friend who used to be really close to me and caring ,out of nowhere starts acting cold and pretends he doesnt care ? Like he sometimes gives me his full attention and then out of the blue completely ignores me :/ and he used to tell me a lot of sweet things now our conversations are three words long 🙁 ….
Hi Bella,
My guy instinct tells me he was in love with you and is now retreated because he doens’t like the friends zone. It depresses him and makes him feel worse just being around you.
That’s my gut and from my heart because I’ve done it to a few old women friends myself… back in the day. 🙂
Hopefully my guy is right on this one 🙂
Pete
Hi,
A year ago, I started chatting to a guy who I met on a website where you can meet friends from all around the world (not a dating site), I wasn’t looking for a relationship of any kind at the time as I’d just come out of a serious one. Anyway, we chatted back and forth for a few months everyday and we spoke on the phone everyday too and he admitted that he had fallen in love with me and I told him that I felt the same way. He told me he had plans to move over to UK anyway before he met me (he’s from Canada) and we could meet after he got his visa sorted. We carried on chatting everyday, he was even calling me 3 or 4 times a day at one point and we skyped too. I knew he was under a lot of stress regarding his kids and his ex-wife but since 2 weeks ago, he started becoming cold towards me and now all of a sudden, he has told me that he can not come over here anymore because things have changed regarding his situation and that he wish he could tell me but he can’t and that I deserve more and that he can’t be that guy who can make me happy anymore or make any promises to me anymore and that he’s not coping well with the stress he’s going through at the moment and doesn’t want any relationships right now. I’m very hurt and very confused :/. He was still telling me he loved me 2 weeks ago and that he was getting the paperwork for his visa sorted, still called me 3 times a day and now this. He said he still wants to stay in contact as friends but I don’t know if it’s a good idea or not, I don’t know whether to just ignore his emails and forget about him or stay friends with him even though he really hurt me? Any advice would be appreciated, thanks.
Hi ,
I Just want to tell you that the guy home whom you loved has played with your feelings and he is a liar . Therefore , he is not worth it . Moreover , avoid the married guys and the discovered guys . I don’t trust those guy at all .
On internet anyone can tell a lie . Have have ever met in person ?
Did you read his body language rightly , (Ladies have a natural gift in reading men and know if they are lying or not from the starter ) ?
Meeting on Skype or on any with video chat doesn’t count because the set up of the environment can be set .
Moreover , he have used to fill his emotions thought and then he will come back to his wife , he won’t leave her at all .
My advise is move on and forget about this low life person you met .
Moreover , meet new on in person whom really cares about you .
Don’t be sad at all . Consider as an experience for avoiding the married and divorced type .
There is a say about the divorced ones . Whom leave one his marriage can leave the comming times more easier . Personally I don’t trust these type .
Try to find someone whom don’t have any experience in the relationships and never get laid with any lady . This will be a good chance to control him and make your life happier and make sure no matter what you have did he cannot live without you .
Buy the way I am married and I am happy with my wife . She means everything to me and whatever happens I cannot live without her .
Cheers ,
Have a nice day .
Rami .
Hi peter,
There’s this guy i have been chatting to online via a phone app, for the last 6 months or so.
At first it was just flirting, but eventually we’ve became very close friends, we can talk to each other about nearly everything. I say nearly, because for the last month or so i have developed strong feelings for him and i can’t bring myself to tell him. My intuition also tells me he has feelings for me, but then i become doubtful because at times when i try to initiate a conversation leading to expressing how i feel, he kinda doesnt reply for a few days, then when he does, he shows no indication of not being interested in me, like for example i said i would join him on a trip to thailand and he replied 3 days later with ” alright that sounds divine”, i know he got my message and his phone is practically glued to his side and he generally replies to my messages within the hour, so why would he reply 3 days later?
Also he flirts about girls and not with them in front of me, for example he showers a girl with kisses and flowers (emoji’s)in front of me, even though the girl isn’t present, but gets moody when a guy shows me a tiny bit of attention.
I am starting to lose interest in him, but my heart is trying to do otherwise! Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks